“Award-winning” Made in Chelsea

To the delight of about twenty recession proof households in SW10, Made in Chelsea can now be prefixed with “award-winning.” Although that award is “Best Reality and Constructed Reality TV show.”

Much like winning a “Beauty Contest” in Monopoly, there was a lot more luck than skill involved. Nonetheless, like a student with a stolen traffic cone it will still be brandished as though it actually means something.

Francis Boulle, well known ginger and bench enthusiast later asked: ‘Who would have thought you’d win a Bafta for just being posh?’ A question which successfully echoed the whispers of the entire attending audience.

Past winners have included I’m a Celebrity and The Only Way Is Essex, and stars from those shows have since gone on to established careers as…

There were some suggestions that the cast were a little bewildered by the whole thing, but regular viewers of E4 have assured OnTheBox that this is in fact a quite normal look for Spencer, Binky et al.

Revolution

Revolution

Sky 1 29 March at 9pm

Revolution deals with a topic that has previously only been the subject of rhetorical questions like National Geographic’s Doomsday Preppers – Am I Nuts or Are You?

The struggle to survive in a post-apocalyptic environment where electricity and the last two hundred years of technological development no longer functions is a fascinating hypothetical. One which leaves enormous scope for narrative development: the return to a hand-to-mouth existence, adaptation to a socially and geographically smaller world, or how previously inalienable rights exist and evolve without a formal legal structure.

But Revolution has none of that. It skips all the necessary and interesting ways that a society would evolve in those first months and years and instead focuses on the search for a lost relative fifteen years later. Someone who might (read: in Series 2) have a partial answer to a question posed a decade and a half ago.

Giancarlo Esposito (Breaking Bad’s Gus Fring) and Zak Orth occasionally break through the tedium, but it’s never for long enough to engage with the rest of the cast.

Beyond bad acting, Revolution is beset with simple inaccuracies: middled aged women with perfectly blonde hair from tip to root, clean white and vividly coloured clothing predominates, paths everywhere are neatly cut through shrubbery like a National Trust property, the grossly overweight remain spherical in world where high sugar and high corn products aren’t available and nobody looks even slightly malnourished.

Yet by some distance the most laughable error is one which defines the course of the first episode. Charlie, the insufferable lead actress, befriends a Taylor Lautner imitator called Nate and despite her companions’ warnings, she allows him to accompany them on their journey to find her uncle.

Until it’s revealed that Nate is a member of the Militia tracking her uncle was only using her to track him down. A threat which could’ve been avoided simply by asking Nate to reveal whether or not he has a “Militia” tattoo on his left wrist. Something every single member of the government forces hunting Miles is obliged to have, even when working undercover.

The greatest risk with taking a court case to the Supreme Court is that if your side loses, it can be decades before the court is willing to revisit the subject. The television and film equivalent is when an initial book-to-screen adaptation goes badly and the writer or topic is written off as “unfilmable.”

Conversely, if a subject or author proves successful, commercial development can and will continue indefinitely. This is why we have a surplus of vampire fiction, Debra Messing is somehow still getting work and why Stephen King can auction the film rights to his next departure lounge novel before he’s put pen to paper on page one.

Revolution’s concept deserves better than this and it would be a shame if this blundering attempt were to doom a niche which has enormous potential.

JJ Abrams is the biggest name in Hollywood who has done nothing to deserve it. A director that once had the same potential as an early Spielberg now consistently underwhelms like M. Night Shyamalan. He may have once delivered Lost to critical acclaim, but doesn’t appear to have learnt any lessons from the disaster it turned into.

Revolution is a high concept show with low ambition and middling production values; Revolution’s directors Steve Boyum and Charles Beeson have biographies that reflect this. Unsurprisingly, much of their previous work overlaps with JJ Abrams production credits.

Revolution starts exclusively on Sky 1 HD on the 29th March 2013 at 9pm

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When The Exploited Becomes The Exploiter

You know what they say about models turned actresses? Nothing bad. Ever.

With that in mind, Sky Living have given Naomi Campbell her own show: “The Face.” She promises that “the show is a real insight into the modelling world, it’s authentic and fast paced.” Take that, doubters.

Naomi got her big break when she was 15 years old, and just like the exploited child she was then, is now on the look out for ‘the next big (little) thing’ to commodify.

She’ll be searching for a diamond in the rough, to polish and later profit from. Although she won’t be getting any help from Charles Taylor this time.

The multi-talentless Campbell has also appeared in countless TV shows, music videos and films including: “The Cosby Show,” “Ugly Betty”, “Absolutely Fabulous”, “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,” Madonna’s “Erotica,” Bob Marley’s “Is This Love” and Michael Jackson’s “In The Closet”

She later said “I’m looking for contestants who have the whole package – a beautiful face, great body, unique look, confidence, drive and passion, the ability to change and transform a willingness to follow direction, and, above all, a strong work ethic,” seemingly confusing wannabe models with the border collies she had just been watching on Crufts.

Auditions are being held around the country now. Female models 18 years or older, with or without previous experience who want to apply should email: thefacecasting@princesstv.com, or call 020 7985 1803 / 0757 223 8368

Bad News: Good News Returns

Russell Howard’s Good News returns for a brand new series on Thursday 25th April. The show is BBC Three’s most successful entertainment series and it was also recently voted the ‘Best Ever BBC Three Show’ by Digital Spy users, taking the top spot ahead of Gavin and Stacey, Little Britain and Being Human.

Billed as an insightful look at global goings-on with Howard’s “unique” angle on the news each week, it features a warning before each episode that it “may contain adult humour.” It doesn’t.

According to the show’s PR, Good News is sourced from over 60 international news channels and 140 newspapers from around the world: “[Russell] and his Good News team will leave no stone left unturned in their pursuit of the strange and sublime stories that have been dominating the media over the past seven days.”

It’s news for people who don’t watch the news. It’s laughter for people who aren’t yet computer literate enough to get their pop culture jokes from Sickipedia and still find jokes about John Prescott’s weight on Have I Got News For You funny.

Viewers at home can shape the show’s agenda by submitting news stories online via Twitter @bbcgoodnews. OnTheBox recommends submitting as many Onion , Daily Mash, News Thump etc links as possible.

Just maybe we could make this happen.

Do you have TOWIE depression?

Despite what occasional viewing of their robotic acting might’ve led you to believe, TOWIE cast members are capable of feeling serious emotion.

According to NOW! Mario Falcone has confessed to seeing a therapist for the past two months due to depression – an apparent side effect of his ‘love cheat’ label.

The following are the nine classic symptoms that a doctor looks for when considering a diagnosis of depression:

If you answer yes to at least 5 of the questions below, and symptoms have been present weekday evenings whilst watching ITV, you should seek professional help.

1. Depressed mood?

2. Marked loss of interest or pleasure in activities which used to give you pleasure?

3. Significant weight gain?

4. Insomnia (difficulty falling or staying asleep) or sleeping too much?

5. Feelings of either apathy or agitation?

6. Loss of energy?

7. Feeling of worthlessness or guilt?

8. Inability to concentrate or make decisions?

9. Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide?

Whilst you wait for doctors to arrive, assume the foetal position and put this on repeat:

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TOWIE Eggsplosion!

As the cast of the structured-reality ITV show filmed scenes for the latest series of the Eggsex based drama, cast members were attacked by a battery of free range projectiles.

A passing car hurled the potential baby chickens at Lauren Pope, Chloe Sims and Bobby Cole Norris as they arrived at Luxe in Loughton to party with fellow castmates until the cock crowed.

Although no Z-listers were harmed in the making of this scene, a cameraman was hit by a small eggsplosion and some equipment suffered eggsternal damage.

The potential assailants were too chicken to stick around for long but the stars stayed sunny side up and enjoyed the rest of their evening without any more eggstraordinary behaviour

Whilst members of other shows might have cracked, this wasn’t TOWIE’s first eggsotic encounter, as other cast members were bombarded with eggs while filming series 3 in 2011.

As a serious journalist, this has egghausted me.

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Caeser Must Die – An interview with the Taviani Brothers

Each year the inmates of Rome’s high security Rebibbia prison, incarcerated mostly for Mafia-related crimes, put on a play. The Taviani brothers follow the rehearsals and performance of Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar. When the performance ends, the lights dim on the actors and they become prisoners once again as they are accompanied back to their cells.

Cassius, one of the main characters, one of the best actors has been in prison for many years, but tonight his cell feels different, hostile. He remains still. Then he turns, looks into the camera and tells us: “Since I have discovered art, this cell has turned into a prison.” Read more

Late Night Love with Bruce Willis

With the passion and excitement of Die Hard long gone and only the occasional meteor taking the fight to Russia these days, some might say that the man who brought us ‘The Siege’, ‘Tears of the Sun’, and ‘Grindhouse’ has gone soft.

However, way before he was known as Ashton Kutcher’s dad and played hide and seek with Haley Joel Osment, Walter Bruce Willis was just a man with a dream. Read more

Save Leverage – The Fans Speak

Last week OnTheBox writer Alastair Newport wrote a damning review of the opening episode of the fifth season of Leverage. Within minutes the comments erupted in outrage, our Twitter was overwhelmed and it became clear that Leverage fans are a special kind of loyal.

Here in their own words, crowdsourced from Grifters across the globe and put together by Ali Kien and Jeannean Sword are the reasons we should #SaveLeverage:

Leverage is cancelled. So what? It’s just a show, get over it. This is what networks, critics and non-believers have tried to cram down fans throats for the past month. Apparently, they never understood the significance this show had in today’s society and on the shows fans. Leverage premiered in December, 2008 as society called for change and relief from the economic turmoil that sent shockwaves across the world. Leverage provided viewers with heroes, a group of misfits who came together and rose up against evil corporations to fight for the little guy.

Over the past five years, Leverage provided a fun, fast-paced action dramedy that was suitable for audiences of all ages. There was no gratuitous sex, over the top violence, or inappropriate dialogue. Families could sit down together and enjoy an hour of entertainment and lose themselves in these characters. Each fan had their favorite; whether it was the Mastermind, Hacker, Hitter, Grifter or Thief, we relished in watching each of them grow season after season.
Through trials and tribulations this group of loners became a family and so did we.

What made Leverage different was that it was not just another formatted crime drama, reality show or crude comedy. It was unique, it told stories that people dealt with everyday. Losing their job, getting foreclosed on, getting swindled; these things happen and the common man has nowhere to turn. Leverage touched the lives of the viewer like no other show could. We laughed, cried, cheered, and shouted “Dammit Hardison!” For that brief moment every week we forgot our troubles and escaped. Leverage saved us from ourselves and restored the hope that one day the corrupt would be brought to justice.

Leverage was also distinctive in that the actors, writers, producers and crew reached out to fans through social media. They let us into their world, which is so often protected by other shows, and let us be a part of their family. Through Twitter, Facebook, and Google+, fans from all over the world could come together and talk to the cast and crew, argue over the best episode; or debate the controversy when Eliot (Christian Kane) cut his hair.

The fans (Grifters) tirelessly supported Leverage; rallying to gain renewals each season and promoting the show until carpel tunnel set in. This resulted in the Fifth season premier being the #1 cable show in the coveted 8pm timeslot. Everyone was actively involved and engaged and that impacted the shape of the show.

Since cancellation, Leverage has gained in popularity as seen by the increase in likes on their Facebook page and the multiple new pages that have sprung up to “Save Leverage”. Leverage won the People’s Choice Award making history as the only cancelled show to ever win. In the “Best of 2012″ poll Leverage received 1,297,589 votes, out voted only by ABC’s Juggernaut Castle.

Fans continue to show their support by signing petitions; writing, emailing and tweeting
networks asking that Leverage be picked up for another season; and voting in every poll created in order to save our show. We all know TV is about making money. Leverage has an intensely strong following; with proper promotion and a consistent timeslot Leverage could prove to be a real cash cow to some lucky network.

While the reasons Leverage deserves another chance are truly endless, the main point is: there are wolves in the world and sometimes the bad guys are the only good guys you’re gonna get.

Save Leverage

Like OnTheBox on Facebook and follow us on Twitter for all the latest #SaveLeverage news

You can do you bit by following this link to OnTheBox’s complete list of the people you need to contact to make sure that your voice is heard.

Interview with Chicago Fire star Eamonn Walker and executive producer Derek Haas

What has filming in Chicago been like?

Eamonn Walker: Chicago is like home to us. To give you an example, last night I took my son to Buddy Guy’s. I didn’t book, I just said let’s go and see if we can get in and literally we walked through the door and it was like, “Oh my God, Chicago Fire’s in the house.” I said, “We didn’t book.” He was like, “We’re going to make space for you. We love what you do, we love Chicago Fire.” And the doors just opened up. And I reckon that’s just a metaphor for all of Chicago. That’s my experience with Chicago. We’ve been welcome.

Derek Haas: It’s been a dream to shoot there. The city has let us in at some many places and we actually shot at the top of the Willis Tower, formally known as the Sears Tower. Any locations we’ve wanted they’ve just rolled out the red carpet. It’s been great. Read more

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