Jordan & Cilla Black Sign Up To Make Nation Vomit

May 7, 2010 by  
Filed under - Home, News

Next time you board a flight unencumbered by volcano ash you might want to think about keeping your sick bag for a later date if you have any intention of watching ITV1’s Benidorm. It has been announced that the fetid off-casts of various silicone ‘beauties’ known as Jordan is set to make a guest appearance as “a chavvy Brit abroad? alongside the re-animated corpse of Cilla Black who will play an elderly swinger.

The show’s creator Derren Litten – pending a name change to Derren Cretin – told Attitude Magazine that Jordan’s role will mostly constitute “getting them out for the lads and lying by the pool? adding : “She probably won’t have to do too much acting?.

It is possibly the most desperate and shameful pairing ITV have ever concocted to attract audiences and this is the channel responsible for I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here and Loose Women. Quite an achievement, even by ITV’s ‘standards’.