Britain’s Got Talent Winners Interview: Diversity On Winning And Susan Boyle

May 31, 2009 by  
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Anyone with half a brain will agree that Diversity were the deserving winners of Britain’s Got Talent 2009.

As SuBo mania swept over the world and the Hairy Angel’s increasingly bizarre exploits dominated column inches, Diversity kept true to what they do best: rehearsing, training and crafting an eye-poppingly creative dance routine that had the entire nation (except Piers – BOO!) grinning from ear to ear.

Anybody that can work a human Scorpion Transformer into a dance routine is all good by us.

We headed down to the Winners’ Press Conference first thing Sunday to get the lowdown from Ashley Banjo – the troupe’s choreographer – on how they felt, what their plans were, and quite what they thought of snatching the title from the most famous woman in entertainment.

Firstly, congratulations guys. How did you rate your chances against Susan Boyle?
To be honest, we thought we had What? What? Read more…

Doctor Who’s New Companion!

May 29, 2009 by  
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Behind every good Timelord there’s a nubile young minx with sex appeal and brains to boot – and the new series of Doctor Who is no exception.

From a list of potentials for the much coveted role, which is rumoured to have included Kelly Brooke and Lilly Allen, 21-year-old Scot, Karen Gillan emerged victorious.

Karen will be appearing opposite new doctor Matt Smith in the new series of the show which will be aired around Easter 2010.

She said: “I am absolutely over the moon at being chosen to play the Doctor’s new companion.”

Filming on the new series will begin in July for transmission around Easter 2010. Tennant’s final episodes will air this Christmas.

As if that wasn’t cool enough, did you hear about James Bond joining the cast? If you’re still sating to scratch that sci-fi itch, head over to our 10 Confusing Sexy Sci-Fi Crushes or check out Dude, Where’s My Flying Car?, our titillating run-down of sci-fi movies’ greatest futuristic inventions….

Give Them A Grilling: Interrogation Scenes To Fry Your Brain

May 29, 2009 by  
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With the scorcher of a Bank Holiday weekend behind us, most people are still sweating out the hulking great amounts of meat they consumed whilst indulging in polite conversation and the odd tipple (I make that Pimms O’Clock!)

It’s no surprise, therefore that we are celebrating National BBQ Week! (Fans of the site may have noticed, we try to milk every useless money-making scam of a celebration for all it’s worth).

We at OTB have worked long and hard (or for about an hour and a half at least) At least we’re honest! Click here for more….

Sex and the City: London

May 29, 2009 by  
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First came Sex and the City and it was good. Then there was Lipstick Jungle and Cashmere Mafia in the States and Mistresses over here.

Now the TV juggernaut of powerful, successful confident women is well and truly barrelling down the mainstream expressway like bunch of wayward hormones with BBC3’s Personal Affairs.

The new show, written by ex-Eastenders writer Gabbie Asher follows the fortunes of four personal assistants living in the City.

The series will star Laura Aikman, Annabel Scholey, Maimie McCoy and Ruth Negga and, according to Asher, “truly captures the unique experience of working in an office with a group of girls – the fun, the friendship, the bickering, the hopes and dreams, the tears and the personal dilemmas that arise every day.?

And of course – perhaps most importantly – the millions of outfits.

Desperately Seeking Fame Review: Kissy Sell Out

May 29, 2009 by  
Filed under Reviews

01DESPERATELY SEEKING FAME, Friday 29th May, Current TV, 10.00pm Alert Me

I never thought I’d say it, but Current TV’s Desperately Seeking Fame makes BBC3′s pitiable programming schedule look positively highbrow. 

Made up of three shows: The Dark Side of Fame, The Queen of Kiss and Sell and How To Be A Reality TV Star, Current TV takes aim at the “culture of celebrity” and the chav-tastic plebs that have kept Big Brother on our screens for nigh on ten years.

Unfortunately, the programmes became more like a How To Make Crap Telly 101:  it seems that the ‘Culture of YouTube’ has ensured that every Media Studies graduate with a decent camcorder is cursed with delusions of documentary-making grandeur. If only the film-makers had watched Sounds Like Teen Spirit before embarking on these tacky, crass projects. Mee and indeed ow. Still, she has a point. They are muppets…

BBC Announces Dancing On Wheels (yes, it is what you’re thinking)

May 28, 2009 by  
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Just when you thought reality TV couldn’t get any stupider or mind bogglingly bizarre, the BBC has commissioned a show that even Chris Morris and Charlie Brooker couldn’t have dreamed up in all their cynical, mockingly patronising glory.

Dancing On Wheels will air on BBC Three and pit ‘celebrities’ with those wheelchair bound in a dance competition.

That’s right, you too will soon be able to see mega-stars like Michelle Gayle twirl around the disabled in all their desperate, fame-grabbing glory.

You can’t deny the ‘thumb up’ for championing disabled rights, but….. really?!

What next – Narcoleptics On Ice?!


ER Final Episode ‘And In The End’ Review: A Major Trauma

May 28, 2009 by  
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ER – AND IN THE END: Thursday 28th May, More4, 9pm ALERT ME

It’s hard to believe that after 15 years ER is coming to an end.

For fifteen adrenalin packed years the show that pioneered the use of the frantic fast-paced dolly shots, bringing the viewer right into the heart of the action, has been a trailblazer in every sense.

From the before-its-time in-depth storytelling to a sexy and prodigious young cast, via becoming the most expensive programme in TV history, ER has led the way into an age of increasingly sophisticated television.

And here we are, 15 years later; older, wiser, emotionally drained… But the last episode has got to be good. Doesn’t it?!

Tourettes – I Swear I Can’t Help It Review: Tics All The Boxes

May 28, 2009 by  
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TOURETTES – I SWEAR I CAN’T HELP IT: Thursday 28th May, BBC 2, 9pm Alert Me

I approached this review like a naughty school boy in the headmaster’s office; desperate not to laugh.

Fortunately the makers of this thoughtfully put together programme obviously anticipated the puerile preconceptions of the public at large and have masterfully steered juvenile viewers like myself in the right direction.

There is no cure for Tourettes syndrome, an illness which causes uncontrollable nervous physical impulses which are almost impossible to suppress.

Often these ‘tics’ take a verbal form with sufferers shouting out random words or phrases that come into their heads. Other times the tics can be physical such as hitting out or grabbing hold of We’re hoping it’s not ‘crotch’. Read on…

Susan Boyle Explodes (Not Literally)

May 28, 2009 by  
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You can take the Glasweigian out of Glasgow, but….

Not since Christian Bale’s hilariously multi-accented, spittle-flecked rant on the set of Terminator Salvation has there been such an amusing celebrity meltdown.

After nearly 2 months basking in the spotlight of the world’s media lovebeam, Susan Boyle has been the victim of a brilliantly public meltdown.

If we were reporting this in the style of a Japanese Manga – and most days we truly wish we were – it’d only be fitting to run with the headline:  SUBO EXPLODO!!!

Boyle strenuously denied early reports that she had stunned Britain’s Got Talent fans, contestants and their families with a flicked birdie sign and a ladylike ‘f*&k off’ whilst watching Piers Morgan congratulate schoolboy warbler Shaheen on his semi-final performance.

Yet The Sun has run a story this morning that shows a visibly aggrieved (we’d say ‘narked’) SuBo getting a bit of a talking down from cops. They intervened after ‘The Bo’ (not to be confused with Doctor Who’s Face of Bo) ‘went beserk’ in the lobby of the Wembley Plaza Hotel when two strangers set out to “wind her up.”

We at OTB are all too aware of the media’s corruptive influence in moulding and breaking the fortunes of many a reality TV star, so we can’t say we didn’t see this coming.

Whatever happens, everyone’s favourite spawn of Cabbage Patch Kids/Basset Hound singer looks set to stay in the spotlight for some time yet.

What do you think? She destined to crash and burn or will she too reach the heights of Steve Brookstein?

Armando Ianucci In Milton’s Heaven And Hell Review: Ambrosia For The Eyes And Ears

May 27, 2009 by  
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454ARMANDO IANNUCCI IN MILTON’S HEAVEN AND HELL, Wednesday 27th May, BBC2, 9.00pm Alert Me

In a bid to expand my literary horizons, I bought a beautiful red leather-bound copy of Paradise Lost from a junk shop in the desolate south of Leamington Spa but have always been scared to open it, lest the contents somehow fly off the page and destroy what I’m sure is likely to be one of the best books I’ve ever read.

As one might have saved their odd change in a Superman piggybank, so I am saving Milton for that ever-elusive intellectual rainy day.

Thanks to Armando Ianucci, that day has finally come.

If only all documentaries were so painstakingly crafted by such a rhapsodizing teacher Like Coolio? Read on….

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